Dear Friends,
Last weekend was the first time in four years Bonnie and I failed to send out a weekly message. On Thursday, April 25th, I learned that my son John was being evicted for non-payment of rent and had to have his things out of the apartment before May 1st. Since John is a 47-year old adult, my first inclination was to let him deal with his own problems. Bonnie, my counselor in perplexity, suggested that I would regret not doing something; so, I flew to Atlanta the next morning.
A few minutes alone with John confirmed my worst fears. His alcoholism has taken a terrible toll on his body and mind. Over the next few days, a series of accidents produced injuries that required hospitalization. While in the hospital, John started a detoxification program that continues as I write. The prognosis is not good. If John refuses to “own” his problem, there is little that I or the team of medical professionals working with him can do.
I start out this week’s message with the story of John in order to be honest and humble about the type of family issue that is often swept under the rug. Instead of blame and shame, we are trying to look at John’s problem in the same way one would look at diagnosis for diabetes, cancer, or any other serious illness. I am doing all I can to get John the help he needs. I, and a large circle of friends and family are praying God will touch his heart.
During the past week, I repeatedly saw evidence of God’s hand at work in my life. Although I arrived in Atlanta on Friday, John and I didn’t start to load our rental truck until Monday. We only had a few heavy items, some light furniture, boxes of household goods, and bags of clothing so it seemed that we could handle the job by ourselves.
I hadn’t realized how disabled John had become, so getting a large sleeper sofa out of the apartment, into an elevator, and down to the truck seemed like a herculean task, and neither of us qualified as Hercules. I was walking to the truck with a few smaller items, taking time to think, when I happened upon a mountain of a man — one of the maintenance men for the apartment complex.
“How would you like to earn a quick $30?” I asked.
I explained my problem and he got another worker to help him. They had the sofa downstairs in a flash. They tried to refuse the money, but I gave them more than promised because they had solved a huge problem.
After I loaded all the boxes on the truck, it was time to load the sofa. John and I put it on a furniture dolly and were maneuvering it up the ramp when it became unbalanced. John was on one side and I on the other. Suddenly, John gave the sofa a large push, lost his footing, and fell face down onto the concrete driveway. I heard him cry out as he fell, then I felt the sofa topple over toward where he lay. I held on with all my might and screamed as loud as I could for help. The mountain of a man who had helped before raced out of the underground garage and helped me settle the couch on the truck. He then comforted John while I called 9-1-1. (Angel #1)
After John was taken by ambulance to the hospital, I managed to finish loading most of the remaining large items, occasionally aided with a push from my new guarding angel.
After securing the truck for the night I went to the hospital. John had already had several tests and others were planned. The attending physician told me they would be keeping John overnight, so I returned to my motel to grab some sleep. At 3 AM, John knocked on the motel room door. He had left the hospital AMA (against medical advice). He entered the room and proceeded to recount in great detail a hallucination he was having. I managed to get him to settle down somewhat, and we both struggled to get to sleep until about 7 AM when I got up and got ready to finish the job of moving John’s belongings.
Back at the apartment, I started carrying more items down to the truck while John looked around to see if he had anything else to pack (his roommate still had her items to move.) When I returned, John was applying bandages to his knees. He had fallen over something in the bedroom.
I spoke to Bonnie on the phone and we both prayed God would help me find a way to convince John to return to the hospital. Fearing John would get in more trouble if he stayed in the apartment, I asked him if he could walk two blocks to the AT&T store to turn in his cable box and remotes. He jumped at the assignment and was on his way.
When he returned he told me he had fallen, again. “Lord, please help!” I pleaded.
A loud rap on the door startled both of us. When I opened the door, a paramedic and a police officer stepped into the apartment and asked John if he was OK. “No! Officer, he isn’t officer. Please help.”
As the paramedics loaded John onto a stretcher, I spoke with the apartment manager who had come with the officers. She had seen John staggering and called 9-1-1-. She was my guarding angel #2.
Once again, I went back to the task at hand. I finished loading the truck and then went to the hospital. I stayed until I knew that John would be on a 48-hour hold, then returned to the motel to rest and get ready to unload the truck the next day.
The next morning, I arrived at Public Storage wondering how I was going to cram all the items in my 15’ U Haul into a 5’x10’ storage unit. I backed up the truck to the door and started to unload the lighter items. The sofa and the mattresses had to go into the unit first, so I started to push the sofa toward the ramp.
A woman who had been watching me work raced over when she saw me pushing the sofa. “Are you planning to do all this by yourself?” She asked.
“Mam, this isn’t L.A. where you can find workers to hire around every Home Depot. It needs to be unloaded and I pray God will give me the strength to do it.”
Just then her moving van rolled in. She summoned the driver and said, “Help this man get his sofa into his storage unit. I’ll pay you extra.” (Angel #3)
I thanked the woman and assured her they would be well-paid for helping.
[Mini Miracle: As Bonnie will attest, I normally carry only a few dollars in my wallet. This trip I carried much more].
A few minutes later, the sofa and a heavy loveseat were perfectly positioned in the storage unit. I continued to load things onto the elevator as the workers started filling their truck with Angel #3’s goods. Every now and then I would go to the elevator to go down for more items only to find that the men had loaded my items on the elevator. (Angels #5 & #6)..
Miracle of miracles … everything fit in the unit. I went downstairs to thank the woman and her crew for all the help. She was standing at the rear of her truck talking to the driver. I overheard her say that she would probably have to rent another truck.
“So in everything, do to others what you would have them do for you.”
Matthew 7:12 (NIV)
“I have a truck,” I offered. “How far do you have to go?
“Just two exits down the freeway.”
“No problem. Let’s get it loaded.”
When we finished unloading at her house, she asked, “Mr. Don, what can I pay you for the use of your truck?”
“Just love the Lord, dear. Love the Lord.”
It turns out she is a member of Reverend Charles Stanley’s Church in Atlanta. Reverend Stanley would be proud of her.
Christians believe the words found in Romans 8:28: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who, who have been called according to his purpose. What good, you may ask, can come from John’s tragic situation?
Perhaps someone who hears about John’s problems will pause to examine their own life and think before they drink. Maybe one of the many who have written me to say they will pray for John will decide they need to come into a closer relationship with the One they are praying to. I am prayerfully hopeful that John will face the facts and follow the path to a new life he is being offered.
I know John would want to thank you for your loving thoughts and prayers.
Blessings,
Your Friends in Christ
Because He Loves Us Press 